Day
6: The Power of Photography 20
May 2012
Ever since yesterday I cannot stop
thinking about Justine and her friends, they way their faces lit up when they
saw the camera, held it, saw the pictures that were taken. I love photography and taking pictures, but their enthusiasm for it was far beyond what I have ever
experienced. It was absolutely
incredible.
The joy that one picture, especially
a portrait, brings these children is something I cannot even explain with
words.
When I think about how some of these
children may have never seen themselves in a mirror, let alone a camera or a photograph of
themselves… I try, but can’t quite comprehend what that must feel like. I grew up looking in the mirror, taking
pictures all the time and posing and having “model photoshoots” with my sister
when bored. I cannot remember the first
time I saw a camera, my picture, my reflection in a mirror, anything… for me it
is just… normal. It was bewildering to
learn that this was not the case for these children. I had never sat down and pondered about
this. If I had, of course the idea does
not seem irrational or far-fetched, but since it is such a normal thing for me,
I never thought of thinking of the power a photograph can have prior to coming
here.
Some children know that muzungus (white people) have cameras that show the image in the back, and after taking their picture
they look at you and at the camera, waiting for you to turn it around and show
them the result. Others are surprised
when this happens. But all of them, no
exceptions, laugh like crazy when they see themselves on the screen! A timid laugh, but such a joyous one! True, true happiness.
 |
| So Happy!! |
There are also those that have asked
me to take a “snap” of them. The ones
that know a little English say “photo?”
And the children… they just look at the camera with those beautiful
eyes, full of excitement, enthusiasm and curiosity. Often they do not speak, but it is not hard
to decipher what they want.
On the day we went to the market a
young man walked towards me from one of the fabric shops and standing straight
and still in front of me asked, “my photograph?” I never saw that man again, I interacted with
him for about one minute and then he left, and I left. He saw his picture for about five
seconds. I took the camera, with his
photograph. He wasn’t even able to keep
the photograph, but he was still so happy and excited to have it taken. Then
there are those that have little interest in the camera and become offended if
asked to take a picture of them, like the ginger woman at the market.
I find the stark contrast very
interesting, yet so logical. Just like
when we were walking around the market and everyone looked at us, taking
pictures sometimes receives a similar response.
And I could not understand them more.
Who are we to go around taking pictures of people, as if they were
museum pieces, or pretty flowers with bees on them? Since when have people and their
surroundings, because they are so drastically different from our reality,
become an object of art? Of exotic
material worth showing to our friends and families so that they may see how far
we went, how poor the people are, how horrible their lives are, how much they
suffer. Again, we have no right to do so
and should be ashamed if that is what our objective is when we point the camera
at someone or something.
This had crossed my mind before,
while in the US, but I had never pondered on it, nor did I know the answer to
whether or not that was actually the reality.
Realizing this has truly challenged me to reflect and question myself as
to why… why do I take pictures of these people and their country? Am I unconsciously doing the same thing that
upon reflection find so repulsive?
Treating people as objects?
Artifacts from a far off land, from another reality? As a sort of entertainment to show first world
citizens to widen their knowledge of the world?
I will be honest, this is not something that has been easy for me to
do. Today I was taking some pictures of
a few children we saw along the road and these questions and thoughts kept
bugging me. I want to believe that I am
not using my photography for these reasons.
And I truly think that that is the truth. But I can’t help but to think that it could
well be mistaken for all those selfish motives.
In reality, there are various
reasons why I am so interested in photographing the people here in Uganda. And yes, one reason is because of the empathy
component. Back in the US I saw many
pictures of African children, on National Geographic, on the internet, on
pamphlets of charities and NGO’s asking for donations to help the starving
children. These photographs caused such
empathy in me that more than once I donated money, read more about an issue,
and tried to tell my friends, family and myself to be more grateful for what we
have. And I know that others with more
economic resources donate larger amounts of money, and travel to places like
Uganda to help people, and create foundations, and build hospitals and schools
like many of the ones we see here. And
all because of photographs that they saw of individuals living in a reality
different from theirs. This is one of
the aims I hope to achieve with my photography here. But I have noticed that that is not as easily
said than done. There is a fine line
that separates the search for empathy in others and the use of human beings as
objects of marketing, status or profit.
And it is that line that scares me.
However, once I started reflecting
on this, I realized that apart from the fact that I hope that one day my
photography can help these individuals and not just remain as memories of a
journey, there is something else about Uganda that draws me to photograph it. And that, I found out is the happiness of the
children. It is so REAL. HAPPINESS as I have never seen it
before. The children here are carefree,
liberated, independent, brave, strong, curious, and confident. I am not sure why, but I just cannot help but
to try to capture their character in their photographs. I don’t know if I photograph them because I
want to remember their faces, their smiles, and their spirit, or simply because
I want others to see their beautiful smiles.
Those reasons seem so selfish to me that it’s hard to think about them.
But there is one aspect, the most
important, about the children in particular that makes me want to spend hours
and hours photographing them (as opposed to most adults or places) and that
makes me feel better about the selfish reasons: their response. Like I said, they get so happy when they see
their picture! They have very difficult
lives, yet they see themselves on a screen and they seem to be the happiest
children in the entire world! I keep on telling myself that I am making them
happy with my photography, and thus, I am not doing anything wrong. But am I?
Is this just an excuse that my unconscious mind is making? Am I just another self centered girl with a
camera taking pictures of poor little Ugandan children to show my friends and
family? I hope not. Yes, I want my friends and family to see
them, their smiles are so beautiful and their laugh so contagious. And I want to somehow help them! But
how? Is photography really going to do
that?
I am getting confused. I am going to sleep; it’s too late to be
thinking about this, I will get a headache.
…. Maybe that’s an excuse too…
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